Fall in Love With the Journey
There was a fisherman who lived in a small village by the sea. He would wake up early every morning, go out to sea, catch enough fish for his family's needs, and then spend the rest of the day relaxing with his family and friends. One day, a wealthy businessman visited the village and saw the fisherman relaxing in the sun. The businessman asked the fisherman why he wasn't out fishing more, and the fisherman explained that he had already caught enough fish for the day and was enjoying spending time with his family. The businessman then went on to explain that if the fisherman worked harder and caught more fish, he could sell the extra fish at the market and make more money. With that money, he could buy a bigger boat and catch even more fish, eventually hiring other people to work for him and building an empire. The fisherman asked what he would do with all that money and the businessman replied that he could finally retire and spend his days relaxing in the sun with his family. The fisherman paused and said…."But sir, that's exactly what I'm doing now." 1
Human Things
When my wife and I were dating, people would ask, “When are you two going to get engaged?” Then we got engaged and people immediately started asking, “When’s the wedding?” Literally, at our wedding, we got the question, “So, when are you going to start having kids?” Can we just chill out? Why can’t we as humans be present and enjoy the season that we are in?
Time in the Middle
With every goal, there is a beginning, middle, and end. The middle is where we spend most of our time, there’s no way around it. That is why the journey along the way is so important. During this season you will want to focus on:
- The person you are becoming
- Relationships
- Being present
- Celebrating along the way
Focus on who you are becoming: You can achieve a goal and still be a jerk. Remember being the type of person you want to become doesn’t happen overnight. Being a person of integrity, discipline, honesty, a good listener, fill-in-the-blank takes time.
Relationships matter most: My grandpa would always say “Enjoy the little things in life…for one day you’ll look back and realize that they were the big things.” You can’t make old friends overnight, you only get your kid’s toddler years once, and having a life-giving marriage takes intentionality, the list goes on and on. Don’t neglect the people that matter most to you just to be the achiever that gets to the finish line but then has no one to celebrate with.
Be Present: Having a growth mindset and planning for the future is a wise thing to do. That doesn’t mean you overlook the blessings and opportunities right before your face. No one knows what tomorrow will bring, so we must live “anxious for nothing”. 2 Enjoy a sunny day, the ability to help a neighbor, a warm cup of coffee, or a kiss from your spouse.
Celebrate along the way: Find ways to celebrate small wins. Don’t get me wrong having the ability to put your head down and grind until you reach your goal should not be frowned upon. I have a habit of doing this to the point where the moment I achieve my goal, I will get sick for a couple of days after. I don’t suggest doing this though. The journey is more sustainable in the long run if you make it enjoyable. Andy Stanely says "What is celebrated is repeated”. 3 If you hit your monthly goal, go get ice cream. If you hit your weekly goal, take a walk to your favorite coffee shop. If you write for an hour distraction-free, now go get yourself a snack! Find small ways to grow the habit of success.
Another One
I live in Buffalo, NY so this has happened every year of my life. I’ll be at a party watching the Buffalo Bills game. If the Bills lose and are eliminated from the playoffs. In seconds someone will say, “well, there’s always next year.” The same thing is true with goals. We always want something new, maybe to go visit a new area, seek a new job, or get a new degree. Setting goals is healthy and a part of life but remember, goals come and go. Don’t wish away a season or even a day.
“Transformation is a process, and as life happens, there are many ups and downs. It’s a journey of discovery. There are moments at mountain tops and moments in deep valleys of despair.” – Rick Warren